I have fever, 38.6 degrees celsius, i wanted to take a day off sch tmr(take mc), but my 2nd eldest bro objected to it. Soon, my whole family began to quarrel over this.My father then began to say no nid to take mc one.......and said dat he's gonna call and meet the principal over such a matter? I WAS LIKE WTH???!!!ALWAYS LIKE DAT! ALWAYS THREATENING ME WITH THIS SAME OLD STUPID MTD of calling the principal...I HATE IT!!(hahaha, i was gonna laugh my head off,u think the principal is so free meh??to entertain u!!haha- a technique i've learnt to keep my cool when somebody offended me by making it seem funny,at least to myself,lol)

and my 2nd eldest bro??? he added fuel to the fire.....even gone to the extent saying dat i wanted to skip pe, pon sch blah blah, and even said dat im getting lazier, and im getting fat due to lack of exercise...-.- AND EVEN compared me to those army ppl(since my bro is in army right now and all), saying dat this was no big deal, those army ppl even have to like carry tons of rice and stuff, despite having high fever.... I HAVE TO LIKE RAISE MY VOICE and shout despite having a bad throat, in order to get thru to them, (if i speak too soft, they cannt hear??!!!-.-), (P.S.: idk why, but shouting seems to be a form of communication in my family,my family is peculiar, isnt it?:( ) IM TIRED OF ALL THESE SHIT, REALLY!!! sry, im getting vulgar, just getting too overworked up.This isnt't my usual self, im just extremely sensitive when it comes to family matters.


Why??? Why is it dat even though im sick, im ALWAYS being provoked and made angry? This will definitely aggravate my condition. and They??? my family simply dun care. even though i was having a fever and i wanted my mum to accompany me to take mc, (i had alr gone to see the doctor once alr, but i only requested for the mc to exempt me frm pe), so i nid to take another mc.BUT MY MUM ASKED ME TO GO MYSELF!

In the end, i came to the conclusion dat I WILL STILL GO SCH TMR!

You know sometimes, all i've ever wanted is for somebody to care for me, i wanted affection frm my parents, but i couldnt get dat love from my parents. I couldnt feel it....they were like HEARTLESS!and i've always wanted praises from my parents, everytime i did smth good, get good results, but nvr once, were they proud of me. EVERYTHING, IS LIKE A BARGAIN...always nid to tao jia huan jia with them, i feel so .........................

I've finally decided that if nobody loves me, i will love myself.(lol, i wont degrade myself to the extent dat.....)Im sry, i've tried to be cheerful....but there's just so many things on my mind......im usually a cheerful person, but i cannt help feeling emo, upon thinking of all these....

Before,my mum was toking to my dad abt my uncle having an affair with a china woman and even wanted to migrate to china to be with dat woman, and my uncle EVEN said dat my auntie was old and haggard-looking alr......my aunt was like so pretty lor, EXCUSE ME??!!!(much more prettier than my mum!lol),and in order to help my uncle cope with the condo bills and all, my aunt even went to the extent of selling ang ku kueh for 2YEARS!, dats why nvr bao yang....become huang lian po le.My uncle WAS TOTALLY HEARTLESS!!!! This has made me lose confidence in men.......

I dun even think anybody will be reading this post too, im just an insignificant being, even if i disappear in this world, i think dat others will still be as happy and joyful as they were before, w/o my presence.I know i sounded emo, but Ppl in the past always take me for granted.Yea, so the moral of the story is:??? Not to be TOO GOOD to anybody....i always give my 100% and all IN THE PAST(Must i stress?lol), but sometimes, i even get none back......so i guess, i've chged pretty much....just disappointed in human beings.......now, i only treat those dat DESERVE to be treated with respect....i absolutely hate ppl who make friends only for the sake of benefiting themselves...and when a person is of no use to them anymore, they got chucked aside.JUST WHO do u think u are??

Some of these things, if u havent been through them, u wont understand.

So, to conclude, what i have to do now, is to study hard and prove my worth to them. I wont ever mind what others say of me,as long as i have a clear conscience.


Please answer my prayers...